Too Inept to Fail: The Lions, Knicks, NHL, WNBA…

With Congress in the mood to buy up any business destined to fail due to its own mismanagement and conflicts of interest, why should our spineless leaders stop with the automakers, airlines, investment banks, pork-barrel mortgage companies, and Jenny & Joey’s lemonade stand? Taxpayers have already invested billions in sports palaces across the nation, and […]

Payback for ‘69?

The Cubs theme song for Wednesday night: 

Defeat the Mets, deplete the Mets,
Step right up and beat the Mets.
Hide your kiddies, hide your wife,
Guaranteed to have a letdown tonight.
Because the Mets are really suckin’ it up,
Letting those Brewers catch right up.
Play-offs, Play-offs, not this year in this town,
Delete the M-E-T-S Mets, keep Flushing down.
Oh, the Cubbies […]

Best Player Never to Have Had a Personality (BPNTHHAP)

It’s Ryder Cup time and that means we get to watch another year of America’s cardboard cutouts chopping their way around a course that will be mastered by a pack of Euros. Valhalla is the venue this year and with that it is time to unveil a new list of golf immortals – those who […]

This Cubs Fan’s New Motto: I Like Ike

I cannot claim that my sports life has not been full of fortunate circumstances. These include:

Working summers at Wrigley Field as a sportswriter
Attending Game 2 of the 2003 NLCS
Attending the clinching game of the NL West by the Atlanta Braves in 1991
Attending the final day game before the Cubs broke tradition with their first night […]

The Commander in Briefs: Sporting Pastimes of Mr. President

With a fawning media circus chronicling his every move without as much as a probing question, Barack Obama appears to be well on his way to claiming the presidency. Through the course of the campaign we have seen the professed White Sox fan bowl like he needed a set of bumpers in Pennsylvania, show off […]

Sports in Song

Nick Digilio, a weekend talk show host for WGN radio in Chicago, has started a recurring segment on songs performed by coaches and players. Rick Geiser, a sports song savant, brings his collection of dusty LPs to the studio to share such classics as:

Tonya Harding’s salute to the Oklahoma City bombing
Jake LaMotta singing “My Way” […]

Today we salute you, Mr. Delusional Boise State football fan

Announcer: Bud Light Presents Real Men of Genius
 
Background singer: Real men of geeenius.
Today we salute you, Mr. Delusional Boise State Football Fan.
Mr. Delusional Boise State Football Faaaaaan!
Season after season, year after year, you think you should rank among the top BCS schools, knowing that you’d go 4-and-4 if you played in the Mountain West.
You […]